A Perfect Vacation - Care of the Federal Correctional System

We have been home less than a week from our yearly pilgrimage to the federal correction center.  Overall it was one of our best vacations in quite a long time...wait a minute...how can a visit to a federal penitentiary be a "best vacation"?  I guess it all depends on what you rate them against.  It is the one time of the year when for a brief moment we are all together as a family. 

Unfortunately we did not get there in time on Saturday to spend any time with my husband, visiting hours technically end at three and with traffic delays we would not be there until two.  So off to the hotel to enjoy the sun and some pool time, but early to bed so we could get there first thing in the morning.  The earlier you get there the better the chances are that you can get in first thing. 

I just love how the federal system works and how the employees run the business.  It is a good thing that we do not get to send in customer satisfaction surveys because many of the "employees" would fail.  Visiting hours start officially at 8am.  We were there at 7:15am and were the sixth visitors on the list for the day.  Someone in the group called around 8 to see if they were ready and we were told that they would call us when they were ready.  It was after 8:15 by the time they called down and took the first six visitors (that was close!).  By the time we turned in our paperwork, went through the metal detectors and put our shoes and belts back on it was after 8:40 before we were pointed to our assigned visiting location.  By the time my husband came out it was close to 9am.  So much for visiting hours starting at 8. 

We stayed the whole time we were allowed, which is basically until 2:30pm when they start encouraging people to leave so everyone is actually gone by 3 so they can go home, even though visiting hours end at 3pm.  We enjoyed the wonderful vending machine food that they charge way too much for and contains mostly grease and cholesterol, but the inmates look forward to since it is usually better than their regular meals. 

I should feel blessed that my husband is at one of the better facilities.  I have heard so many stories from other people about the conditions in different places that we are glad he is where he is, even though it is so far from us.  I do hate to think what happens after we leave when my husband passes through the door.  Many of you may know exactly what I mean.  It is one of those things that I don't want to know about and try not to think about. 

From there we began the vacation part of the trip.  We spent a few days on the beach a few hours away.  Just relaxing and forgetting all our problems and stresses.  The weather co-operated unless you count the earthquake and the hurricane but neither of them seemed to put a damper on our trip.  We laughed about the earthquake and enjoyed the extra surf that the hurricane whipped up. 

I love the ocean but I decided that this is the last year I will go there without my husband.  So either I need to figure out a way to get him out before our next family vacation or we don't go until he is home.  Not sure what my options are because my daughter has informed me that we NEED to go back next year at the exact same time.  Anyone with a teenage daughter can assume that there is a boy involved.

I would even go as far as to say it was almost a perfect vacation.  The only thing missing was my husband and the fact that we were not there as a family.  But this year as I was watching the sun come up and walking the boardwalk, I still had those feelings of loneliness and despair but this year they were mixed with joy, anticipation and a calmness that I have not felt for a long time.  Is it because I really took advantage of the vacation and let go of the stress? or is it because I can look ahead and see that I have climbed the hill and am making my way down.  Is the worst over and a real family life is looming somewhere out ahead of me?  Positive signs are all around me and they energize me even more to keep trudging ahead.

I still have many once in a life time events to make it through alone, but now I think of all the other events that he will be a part of.  It is a small hiccup in time, one that we have all grown from, and one that will forever change who we are and how we live. 

So on that note, take some time to watch the sun rise, have a good laugh and just enjoy the now.  The pain and sorrow will not last forever, so don't let it have all the power.