What a hectic week in our house last week! I picked my son up from the airport on Saturday night and from then on we never stopped until the following Saturday.
With the Thanksgiving holiday we already had plans to spend the day out of town with family but throw in there all the running around that normally goes with the holiday and having all the kids in the house for a week and what a week. The two in school still had sports practices even when school was out, and that meant trips back and forth to school. With my oldest home from college and no car, that meant car sharing or dropping him off and picking him up from everywhere. He was able to get rides to some places but I think he filled every hour of his week home with plans with someone. I think he slept at home only half the time he was home.
We spent a nice holiday surrounded by family. It was a time filled with laughter, smiles and plenty of food and drinks. It seems to me that we should be able to find reasons throughout the year to do this more than once. It is nice to spend the time with family just enjoying each other without worrying about gifts, travel and other "reasons" to get together.
On the first weeknight that we were all home, we all got home late from the high school open house and while I was trying to throw together a quick dinner, my oldest actually sat in the kitchen with me for almost an hour talking about everything. He did not turn on the TV or any video games, he actually hung out in the kitchen talking with Mom! That was the best hour of the whole week and I would not trade that time for anything.
It was that same night that my daughters boy friend was over and later some of my oldest son's friends showed up at the house. The house was full of laughter, chaos and smiles. For a snapshot moment, all in the universe was wonderful and my life was absolutely perfect. I would not trade that moment for any amount of money or trinkets in the world. I would not have even traded our situation for that either, because if it was not for the experiences that we have been through, I would not fully appreciate that moment.
Life is good! It is not perfect and it will never be, but there are some moments that are closer than others. I am not sure what the future holds for us all, but I do know that it is certainly not all bad. There is no way that a house full of such joy and energy could be anything but a bright spot. I have tried to raise my children to look toward the future, strive for greatness, look to the positive in any situation, and model that behavior myself. They say that when you do something long enough, it becomes a habit, so this has become the natural routine in our house and for that we are now seeing the benefits.
Friday, November 30, 2012
Tuesday, November 6, 2012
With Rejection Comes Certainty
Not sure where to start with this one, it has been a while since my last post because I have been mulling over the events of the last month and trying to make peace with them.
My husband had put in his written request to be considered for the other halfway house in this district and we had hopes that all would turn out in our favor. He finally got his answer and it was not as we had hoped. He had been approved by the BOP (Bureau of Prisons) to go to a halfway house in early December, pending approval of a halfway house. The halfway houses both came back with an answer of no. We do not know why they rejected his request, it could be for any number of reasons, but whatever the reasons, it did not make the news any better.
I actually took the news much better than I would have expected a few months ago, and for some reason my immediate response was one of calm and intelligence. Immediately I started thinking and planning for his actual release date. Since he did not get any halfway house time he will need to stay there until his official release date. That means though, that on his release date, I can pick him up at the gate and drive him anywhere we want to go.
The halfway house would have been wonderful to have him back in the area, but it also came with a tremendous amount of uncertainty like; how close to his December date could they get him in? how long before he would be given some freedoms? how long would he staying there? and any number of other questions that could not be answered until we went through everything. But now, there is a certainty to the end of this phase. On a Friday morning in June, I will get to drive up to the correctional center and wait for him to walk out the door and get in the car so we can drive away. Ultimately we will get to come right home and be a family again. I know when it will happen, I know how it will happen and I can now make plans for the time leading up to the release and for the time after. It would have been nice to have him close by for the holidays and all the upcoming spring events but the thought of him being able to come home far outweighs any disappointment with waiting a few more months. In reality, it works out to waiting just another 6 months before he can come home.
As of this moment, we have a little more than 7 months left. It seems odd to finally be talking in terms of months instead of years. So much will happen in those remaining seven months but thinking about the upcoming summer as a family, holidays together and what the future holds, 7 months is a small time to wait.
My husband had put in his written request to be considered for the other halfway house in this district and we had hopes that all would turn out in our favor. He finally got his answer and it was not as we had hoped. He had been approved by the BOP (Bureau of Prisons) to go to a halfway house in early December, pending approval of a halfway house. The halfway houses both came back with an answer of no. We do not know why they rejected his request, it could be for any number of reasons, but whatever the reasons, it did not make the news any better.
I actually took the news much better than I would have expected a few months ago, and for some reason my immediate response was one of calm and intelligence. Immediately I started thinking and planning for his actual release date. Since he did not get any halfway house time he will need to stay there until his official release date. That means though, that on his release date, I can pick him up at the gate and drive him anywhere we want to go.
The halfway house would have been wonderful to have him back in the area, but it also came with a tremendous amount of uncertainty like; how close to his December date could they get him in? how long before he would be given some freedoms? how long would he staying there? and any number of other questions that could not be answered until we went through everything. But now, there is a certainty to the end of this phase. On a Friday morning in June, I will get to drive up to the correctional center and wait for him to walk out the door and get in the car so we can drive away. Ultimately we will get to come right home and be a family again. I know when it will happen, I know how it will happen and I can now make plans for the time leading up to the release and for the time after. It would have been nice to have him close by for the holidays and all the upcoming spring events but the thought of him being able to come home far outweighs any disappointment with waiting a few more months. In reality, it works out to waiting just another 6 months before he can come home.
As of this moment, we have a little more than 7 months left. It seems odd to finally be talking in terms of months instead of years. So much will happen in those remaining seven months but thinking about the upcoming summer as a family, holidays together and what the future holds, 7 months is a small time to wait.
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