The Price We Pay

Whether you believe in God, Karma, a greater being, or the absolute randomness of the universe, you have to sit back and wonder why things happen the way they do. In my last post I talked about how good things were with our visit and felt like things were looking up, and that was the case for about a week and a half. Then the world knocked on my door and just barged in screaming.

One afternoon I got a call from my sister-in-law telling me that she was in the hospital for surgery and my Mom had been admitted down the hall. Turns out my sister-in-law had a sooner than planned surgery but my mom was in there for new blood clots. Long story short, she actually has cancer on her kidney and is still in the hospital 2 weeks later. My Dad's dementia is getting progressively worse, he had a good day Saturday, but a bad day Sunday when we went for a visit.

When I drove the kids out for one weekend to see her in the hospital, as we were getting off the highway, the transmission slipped. We made it back home, but the oil change light and the service engine light both came on during the trip. So now I am driving a vehicle that is not running right, and according to my mechanic needs to have an overhaul of the transmission...translation...lots of money.

One of our cats came home the other day and I knew right away he was not doing well. He had been to the vet in the spring and they had fixed the problem $500.00 later, but of course there were no guarantees that it would not come back. Well, it came back. I don't have the money for another large vet bill, so we are all dealing with the possibility of losing a family pet.

Lots of shut off notices in the mail this month, and juggling them to stay ahead of them all seems to be a little more than I can handle at times. But there are moments when I simply have to sit back and laugh in the face of it all and wonder what could possibly be around the next corner. However most of my time is spent trying to figure out how to handle that moment's most pressing problem while still trying to find solutions for all the other ones lurking up ahead.

So is this the price we pay for having 4 days of happiness and leaving the rest of the world behind? For thinking that there is light at the end of the tunnel? It is a rude reminder that we are all still knee deep in the worst experience of our lives and onward we keep moving.