You wouldn't believe it since my husbands official release date is 18 months away, but he has already started the release process. There is so much involved that it is a bit overwhelming. He has had his official paperwork submitted and is now at the beginning of the waiting period that is our federal justice system.
He has submitted the address of the residence where he would like to be released to. It is a home owned by a family member since we are not sure it would be a great idea for him to return to this small community. I am told that an officer will contact that family member so that the house can be approved for him to move into upon his official release. That house is located in a different Federal District so he will have to get all his paperwork transferred to the new district as well.
He is in the final few months of his program which is suppose to ensure that he gets as much half-way house time as possible. What that means is that he can be released from the prison facility and sent to be supervised in a half-way house closer to his intended release location prior to his official release date. That gets him closer to home, but he is still under strict supervision yet he is allowed a bit more freedoms as he earns them. He will be allowed to hold a real job while he is there, day passes to spend with us and eventually weekend passes. He could eventually even be released from living in the half-way house early if he has a job and a place to live however, he will not be released early of there is no one else living with him in the house, so he will have to serve out the remainder of his time at the half-way house. Oh, and the half-way house gets a large percentage of any money he makes while under their supervision.
Everything that we learn comes with even more questions and no one is around to answer any of them. We all get our information from each other, other inmates, and anyone else we know further down this path than ourselves. We get bits and pieces here and there and sometimes it is mis-information but we keep moving forward.
That is all I know right now and things change from day to day. I am sure by the time you are reading this I will have more information or been told that something else we believed is not really true. Hopefully the information I pass on to you, is based on fact and everything that I am certain of. Looking to a better new year when he will be closer to home.
Wednesday, December 28, 2011
Tuesday, December 6, 2011
Relish In the Victories
I am so excited this morning...I feel like one of the burdens that I have been carrying can be put down for a while and be left alone. I had a meeting this morning with some of the school faculty and finally had a resolution regarding my son and his reading.
At the beginning of the school year my son had been placed in an extra reading class based on his standardized test scores. Since learning of this I have been asking the school to actually test his reading level. My son has always struggled with reading but it was due to dyslexic tendencies and not normal reading difficulties, so putting him in a regular special reading class was not helping him. On and off throughout the last three years I have been politely arguing with the administration to try and get him the help he needs. I have routinely hit polite and well meaning walls. They kept telling me he was doing fine with their programs.
I am his mother...do not tell me that I do not understand and know my children. Academically he does fairly well, high 80s low 90s, but he still struggles with his reading and writing so they were only looking at his grades and the standardized test scores. I kept telling them that he is much smarter than his grades show and he was not getting anything out of the special reading classes. He makes it through his classes now by his own coping mechanisms but what is going to happen when the reading and school works gets progressively harder? I am not content to sit by and let him slide by now only to end up struggling later. Give him the tools to excel now and succeed in the future.
I finally complained my way far enough up the line and they did some specialized reading test. This morning I had my meeting with them and what do you think the results were? My son does not have typical reading issues, his tendencies seem to indicate some kind of dyslexia and would benefit more from some special one on one assistance to teach additional skills to overcome the decoding issues. Isn't that what I had been telling them all long. Why did it take so long to get any answer?
All I can tell you is that I am so relieved right now. I just sat at an hour long meeting to have the administration and faculty tell me that everything I had been telling them about my son is correct and now they are going to start working to help him. As a parent, I wanted to start doing cartwheels down the school hall as I was leaving the building.
This is only the beginning, but the first step is the hardest and yet the most important. I can sit back and enjoy the victory for now, quietly enjoying the weight that has been lifted. I will have to pick it up again as I work with and monitor the work the school does with my son but it is nice to know that I no longer have to carry it everyday.
At the beginning of the school year my son had been placed in an extra reading class based on his standardized test scores. Since learning of this I have been asking the school to actually test his reading level. My son has always struggled with reading but it was due to dyslexic tendencies and not normal reading difficulties, so putting him in a regular special reading class was not helping him. On and off throughout the last three years I have been politely arguing with the administration to try and get him the help he needs. I have routinely hit polite and well meaning walls. They kept telling me he was doing fine with their programs.
I am his mother...do not tell me that I do not understand and know my children. Academically he does fairly well, high 80s low 90s, but he still struggles with his reading and writing so they were only looking at his grades and the standardized test scores. I kept telling them that he is much smarter than his grades show and he was not getting anything out of the special reading classes. He makes it through his classes now by his own coping mechanisms but what is going to happen when the reading and school works gets progressively harder? I am not content to sit by and let him slide by now only to end up struggling later. Give him the tools to excel now and succeed in the future.
I finally complained my way far enough up the line and they did some specialized reading test. This morning I had my meeting with them and what do you think the results were? My son does not have typical reading issues, his tendencies seem to indicate some kind of dyslexia and would benefit more from some special one on one assistance to teach additional skills to overcome the decoding issues. Isn't that what I had been telling them all long. Why did it take so long to get any answer?
All I can tell you is that I am so relieved right now. I just sat at an hour long meeting to have the administration and faculty tell me that everything I had been telling them about my son is correct and now they are going to start working to help him. As a parent, I wanted to start doing cartwheels down the school hall as I was leaving the building.
This is only the beginning, but the first step is the hardest and yet the most important. I can sit back and enjoy the victory for now, quietly enjoying the weight that has been lifted. I will have to pick it up again as I work with and monitor the work the school does with my son but it is nice to know that I no longer have to carry it everyday.
Monday, November 28, 2011
A Challenge to all Those Who Call Themselves Christians
I am always looking for inspiration in anything I can find or in anyone in my life. Recently I attended the Women of Faith conference and let me tell you that those ladies are some of the most inspirational and motivational women I have ever had the blessing to be around. It was like stopping at a gas station to refill your gas tank, they refilled my spirit and showed me that the sun is still shining.
But I still continue to keep my eyes open for the subtle messages that come my way which leads me to my thought for today. Recently the reading in church was from Matthew 25:31-46 and of course I was listening and thinking.
I have many wonderful friends who do not march around proclaiming themselves as Christians, they do not preach to the world with their online twitter and Facebook accounts, they do not boast about how great their church is (some do not even attend church) but they demonstrate and live their lives as intended by this reading. My experiences over the last few years has shown me that many of those people that find it necessary to yell out to the world that they are Christians, are only trying to convince the rest of us that they are good but are not certain that we can see it (or not see it, as the case may be) for ourselves. They are out there prophesying and sharing the message but with a closer look you can see that they are not really living the life that they are encouraging the rest of us to follow. They want us to attend their church, listen to their pastors message, or attend the awesome functions from their community but that is the catch...it is within their community.
They do not reach out to those outside their circles, they do not go beyond their comfort zone and do not help the stranger unless the world is watching or they get the credit that they feel they deserve. Some of these friends are people who have been friends with my husband and me for years but because the situation find it uncomfortable so they have chosen to step back while other friends have jumped in with both feet and been a great support and inspiration. I have never been a strong believer in one religion or church being better than another, just that you live your life according to His word. How can I "follow" someone who does not even follow their own teachings?
So here is my challenge to everyone our there whether they call themselves Christians or not, live your life based on the teachings not based on recognition. Reach out to those in need, write a letter to a long lost friend, help a stranger because you should not because someone is watching, smile at a stranger on the street, hold the door open for someone, make time in your busy schedule for some one who needs a friend and teach The Word by your actions and not your words.
As someone who has benefited from these gifts both as a recipient and the giver, I can offer you no greater sense of joy than knowing how much you touched someone else's life, whether they be a friend or stranger.
But I still continue to keep my eyes open for the subtle messages that come my way which leads me to my thought for today. Recently the reading in church was from Matthew 25:31-46 and of course I was listening and thinking.
I have many wonderful friends who do not march around proclaiming themselves as Christians, they do not preach to the world with their online twitter and Facebook accounts, they do not boast about how great their church is (some do not even attend church) but they demonstrate and live their lives as intended by this reading. My experiences over the last few years has shown me that many of those people that find it necessary to yell out to the world that they are Christians, are only trying to convince the rest of us that they are good but are not certain that we can see it (or not see it, as the case may be) for ourselves. They are out there prophesying and sharing the message but with a closer look you can see that they are not really living the life that they are encouraging the rest of us to follow. They want us to attend their church, listen to their pastors message, or attend the awesome functions from their community but that is the catch...it is within their community.
They do not reach out to those outside their circles, they do not go beyond their comfort zone and do not help the stranger unless the world is watching or they get the credit that they feel they deserve. Some of these friends are people who have been friends with my husband and me for years but because the situation find it uncomfortable so they have chosen to step back while other friends have jumped in with both feet and been a great support and inspiration. I have never been a strong believer in one religion or church being better than another, just that you live your life according to His word. How can I "follow" someone who does not even follow their own teachings?
So here is my challenge to everyone our there whether they call themselves Christians or not, live your life based on the teachings not based on recognition. Reach out to those in need, write a letter to a long lost friend, help a stranger because you should not because someone is watching, smile at a stranger on the street, hold the door open for someone, make time in your busy schedule for some one who needs a friend and teach The Word by your actions and not your words.
As someone who has benefited from these gifts both as a recipient and the giver, I can offer you no greater sense of joy than knowing how much you touched someone else's life, whether they be a friend or stranger.
Thursday, November 17, 2011
One Extra Phone Call for The Holidays
The holiday season is upon us, what does that mean for us? It means we get an extra 100 minutes of phone time during the months of November and December. We all still have to pay for those calls but the inmates are giving more phone time to use. It amounts to another 6 phone calls during the month, which is a bit more than one more call per week. Wahoo!!! House him over 500 miles from his family and then graciously allow him one more phone call per week during the holiday season. Excuse me if I sound a bit bitter, but I am continuously amazed with everything I have learned about our justice system.
I don't think I am bitter exactly, I guess I am more dumb founded by the antiquated ways we treat those who have made bad choices. Yes, he did have a choice in deciding what he did, but who gets to set the bar and determine where the line is drawn whether what he did was so bad that he must go away to prison versus pay a fine and get counseling outside a prison wall. While he is currently locked up, there are no programs available for him to get the counseling he really needs, thankfully my husband found a voluntary program that is as close as he can get and it is helping him tremendously. Now as an inmate he is a ward of the state and his family is reliant on friends for additional support. We get some assistance from the government agencies so indirectly the taxpayers are also paying some of our household expenses as well as his daily needs. The costs to the taxpayers, I figure is roughly $500,000.00 for his entire stay and the minimal support we receive.
The flip side of this would have been to fine him for his choices (putting money back into the system), putting him on some type of supervision and requiring counseling. Even a specialist, at the time of his sentencing did not recommend prison, saying he would benefit more from counseling and supervision. Given this option he would still be working at a full time job, contributing to our household expenses as well as being a tax payer and adding to the tax base instead of draining it. This option over the course of five years would have been a break even situation when considering dollars only. But if you consider the fact that three children would still have their father home and we would still be a family, that is priceless. Not to mention that he would be getting the help he needed as soon as possible.
The public is outraged by the current economic conditions and the fiscal mess our country is in and yet they remain blissfully unaware of the escalating cost and budgets of the criminal justice system. This applies to both the state and federal systems. Lets take some time and thoughtfully review our current system and guidelines to still ensure the safety of the public and best serve the community as a whole.
Wouldn't it be a great Christmas gift to everyone if by next year we were able to ensure that more families were home and intact and that the economy was on the mend due to some thoughtful and forward thinking politicians and officials. The Bureau of Prisons could keep their extra 100 minutes, I would just like to have my husband home.
I don't think I am bitter exactly, I guess I am more dumb founded by the antiquated ways we treat those who have made bad choices. Yes, he did have a choice in deciding what he did, but who gets to set the bar and determine where the line is drawn whether what he did was so bad that he must go away to prison versus pay a fine and get counseling outside a prison wall. While he is currently locked up, there are no programs available for him to get the counseling he really needs, thankfully my husband found a voluntary program that is as close as he can get and it is helping him tremendously. Now as an inmate he is a ward of the state and his family is reliant on friends for additional support. We get some assistance from the government agencies so indirectly the taxpayers are also paying some of our household expenses as well as his daily needs. The costs to the taxpayers, I figure is roughly $500,000.00 for his entire stay and the minimal support we receive.
The flip side of this would have been to fine him for his choices (putting money back into the system), putting him on some type of supervision and requiring counseling. Even a specialist, at the time of his sentencing did not recommend prison, saying he would benefit more from counseling and supervision. Given this option he would still be working at a full time job, contributing to our household expenses as well as being a tax payer and adding to the tax base instead of draining it. This option over the course of five years would have been a break even situation when considering dollars only. But if you consider the fact that three children would still have their father home and we would still be a family, that is priceless. Not to mention that he would be getting the help he needed as soon as possible.
The public is outraged by the current economic conditions and the fiscal mess our country is in and yet they remain blissfully unaware of the escalating cost and budgets of the criminal justice system. This applies to both the state and federal systems. Lets take some time and thoughtfully review our current system and guidelines to still ensure the safety of the public and best serve the community as a whole.
Wouldn't it be a great Christmas gift to everyone if by next year we were able to ensure that more families were home and intact and that the economy was on the mend due to some thoughtful and forward thinking politicians and officials. The Bureau of Prisons could keep their extra 100 minutes, I would just like to have my husband home.
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)